We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
so much tequila, so little girl.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
