All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Randomize