why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
