She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Randomize
