slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
So apparently I’m into choking now
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
