508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize
