The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
