Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Randomize
