Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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