I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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