you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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