Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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