Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
