How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
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