Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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