So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I am puke
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
