Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
