I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
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