He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
you will always have a special place in my vag
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
