This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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