yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize