Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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