You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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