I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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