It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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