I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
where am i from again
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
