i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
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