she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize
