And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
