shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
3pm strippers are depressing
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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