i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Randomize
