don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize