so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
