she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Houston, we have a blender
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
