im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
