Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
