Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Randomize
