Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Green mimosas i think yes
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
