Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
