I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize