i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
The feeling are messing with the penis
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Randomize