yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Randomize
