A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Randomize
