drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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