He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
