I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
