literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
