I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
