Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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