they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Randomize
